My husband and I are happily married, or at least I believe we are. Recently I have noticed that we seem to be drifting apart in a sexual way which greatly concerns me. I have never written to a site like this before and frankly I am not comfortable speaking to my girlfriends about this topic. That is why writing to you affords me a chance to be anonymous which does put me at ease. My husband from the very first has always complimented me on my ass. He is a real "assman", using his terminology. The sex with him has always been great but 17 months into our marriage, he brought up the topic of anal sex. I have never done that before and have many concerns about it. I had initially shied away from it but he does bring it up more and more. I have obviously allowed him to cum on my ass when we have sex doggy style and he has expressed his appreciation for that. He seems to cum MORE when we do that. Now, because he knows I will go no farther, he seems to not even ask for that. I am guessing he does not wish to pressure me into something I am hesitant of doing. My question is multifaceted. First of course is does anal sex hurt? If so, what do I do to overcome or compensate for that? Can it cause some damage to me internally? Is there pleasure in this only for him or can I reach an orgasm as well? Can he cum in my ass with no repercussions? Please help me out in addressing my concerns about anal sex and how it can be done for the mutual benefit of both of us.
6 Replies
Thor / 47 / Man / Likes Women / Single
You bet your ass it will hurt. At first :-)
Thor / 47 / Man / Likes Women / Single
Yeah, at least that's what they tell me! Lol.
Mitchuki / Woman / Likes Men / Single
Anal sex is like taking a dump...over and over and over again in reverse. It's going to hurt, believe me. Nothing goes in or out of your ass easily, or at least without a fight. To overcome the pain, you need to stretch your butthole slowly. I mean sloooooowly. Start with a toothpick, then work your way up to a large cucumber (stop when you reach the size of your lover's chimichanga.) If you are careful with this step, you will be able to perform anal sex without any serious issues (unless your lover is built like a horse.) Some find anal sex pleasurable, but to reach orgasm is near impossible. Does taking a dump bring you to the edge of climax? Probably not. And lastly, if he cums in your ass, you must make sure he does not have any S.T.D.'s since anal sex is highly susceptible to the transferring of diseases. If he is clean, the only consequence is having a slimy butthole full of sperm. Have fun!
Exokisa / Woman / Likes Men / Single
Anal sex can hurt if you aren’t properly prepared for it. It might take a few sessions of anal play that you can engage in by yourself or with your husband. I would say you should spend no less than thirty minutes on anal play and simultaneously getting aroused (rubbing your clit helps) before you attempt sex. When I say anal play, I mean massaging, padding, fingering and maybe even licking if you and your husband are comfortable with that. Your husband can use a dental dam if licking an asshole directly doesn’t appeal to him.
If your husband seems impatient, remind him that if you enjoy everything about anal sex, you’ll probably want to try it again. That’s a win-win for both of you. Pain is bad. If it hurts, you should stop immediately. Now at first it might feel a bit uncomfortable (not necessarily painful) but if your husband goes very slowly and gives your ass a chance to become accustomed to the new sensation, it shouldn’t be bad at all. Using some smaller anal plugs before you start having anal sex, can really help. When doing anything with the ass, remember to use plenty of lube. There is no such thing as too much in this case.
There is a risk of causing serious injury if you aren’t careful (SLOW—at least in the beginning), aroused, and well-lubed up. You don’t want to be drunk or high for this activity. You need all your faculties to properly assess what you’re feeling at all times. You need to be able to tell your husband when if it’s too much, too soon or if he needs to stop all together.
Some women claim they can orgasm just from anal sex. I personally cannot but maybe you can. I need clitoral stimulation. So I would need to rub my clit while having anal sex. This is arousing for most women and will probably greatly improve the experience for you. Your anus has a lot of nerves so it’s very receptive to stimulation of all kinds. If it feels good, enjoy it.
Something I didn’t mention in a similar post about anal sex is that you should always try to take deep breaths. Breathing deeply relaxes you more and improves blood flow. Our genitals become engorged with blood when we’re aroused. It could lead to better sensations and a stronger orgasm.
If your husband cums in your ass it won’t screw up your plumbing, so don’t worry. It’ll just come right back out. I recommend a trip to the bathroom before and after sex. Also, be prepared for some discomfort after sex. You might feel some pain when you sit down at first but it should pass quickly and shouldn’t be enough to deter you from trying anal again if the experience was otherwise pleasant.
Thor / 47 / Man / Likes Women / Single
I did it with my girlfriend once, and she loved it. In fact she asked me to do it. I tried it with another girlfriend, but she absolutely hated it.
Sexy_ass / Woman / Likes Men / Single
I love Big Ass
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