most of my lady friends have me in a "brotherly love circle." i'm not OK with this because there's a few of them i'd like to date or more....
i've tried looking for people online, but i end up screwing up by jumping the gun on my comfort level with the girl i'm interested by either ask slightly personal questions to soon or they dont respond to my initial questions. usually about something in their profile...
if Online dating isn't for me, i'd like to find lady friends i know and pursue something further...not necessarily sex, but as a little more than friends...
7 Replies
Bulldhit / Woman / Likes Women / Single
well Wolfy91, dont discourage yourself and i give you props for your resiliency, stay up dude.
i read your title then i read everything else you wrote. Im'a respond to your title bcuz im in a hurry rightnow. and what i write is not ment to offend you.
alright check it my friend,
the way i got out of my comfort zone was by 1st having that feeling of WANTING to get out of my comfort zone, you know. Then I started looking for some positive reinforcement to bring up my confidence and do away with my timidness. That positive reinforcement happened to be meditation. for real! no joke, check out QiGong. anyways so i would self motivate myself to break out of my comfort zone. The next step was doing what i knew i had to do. Break out of my comforzone and i would say to myself, "you know what fuckit, whatever happens... happens." i had to accept my fear and go with it. I know i cant control the outcomes (what the girl I'm talking to will say/think) and if it doesnt go the way i wanted it to go (example : the girl accepting my date) then fuckit next time. And being around people/friends who i could really have deep conversations brought me up too. Mind over matter my friend say"fuckit and go with it" break the cycle. alrighty Wolfy91, hope that helpd. and sorry for the cussing and miss spelled words. and if i offended you sorry. stay up mann and i wish the best for you. peace
Wolfy91 · thanks B.
Wolfy91 · so basically it's a nut up or shut up thing?
Bulldhit · yah mann. if thats how yuh thinking of it, then yes. Like i said it was a progression to get out of my comfortzone, cuz forreal we people are hardwired and it takes time to develope a new way of thinking but practicing evryday somthn positive makes a positive difference. and another thing find your peace of mind (balance) and "Just be straight up a señorita." play your cards right mann :) peace
Bulldhit · Oooooo and what cleverKAL said "get the girls number!" lol peace mann
cleverKAL / 20 / Man / Likes Women / Single
Just get out there, don't be afraid of rejection, do something that scares you a little, and if you do find a woman at a bar or what not and she stays in the conversation, wait a while before you ask for her number. When you're ready to leave and you've got that number, say something like, " Hey, thanks for talkin with me, I might call you sometime soon." Then call her a day later and ask her if she wants to go out for a couple drinks, if it goes to her voicemail, leave a short message and say, " Hey this is so and so, thought you might want to get a drink tonight around 8, I'll be at the bar where we met last night, if you feel like showing up." and thats it, one message, or one call is enough, keep it simple, like your interested but you won't mind if you never see her again. Keep in mind this is just advice for if you want to try and get laid, not relationships, but who knows, if you pull it off, it might lead to that if you both want it to.
cleverKAL / 20 / Man / Likes Women / Single
Actually, depending on how well you think your conversation with her went, wait a day or two to call her, plus if she was catching a really good buzz, it's a good idea not to wait too long cause you want yourself to be fresh in her mind, whereas if you wait too long she might forget your name or your face, or parts of the conversation, or all three of those things.
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