On the surface, the idea of dating a drug dealer seems to fall pretty clearly into the “Don’t” column on the big “Do’s and Don’ts” list of life. After all, it can mean getting involved in an incredibly dangerous and volatile lifestyle. But dating someone who is a drug dealer (And not a pharmacist, just so we are clear.) brings to the table its own special considerations and challenges if you decide to pursue a relationship with that person.
Does the drug dealer do drugs?
One thing to consider is if the person is just a drug dealer or is also a drug user. If you were to believe every cop shown on television that you’ve ever seen, you might well think that the two go hand in hand. But in reality there are many people who deal drugs who do not use at all, especially when you take into account that illegal drug trafficking is a billion dollar industry and that “working in the field,” so to speak, can be highly lucrative from both a financial and power perspective.
How do you feel about the drugs?
You might also want to think ask yourself if you support illegal drug sales and/or use. Many people would say no outright, but others might give special consideration to some types of drugs. For instance, some casual users would have no problem dating a person who sells a few dime bags of weed to their friends every week but would blanche at the prospect of even being in the same room as a kilo of cocaine. Decide if you are in the all or nothing camp or if you are able to draw a line in the sand regarding what sort of drug dealing you would deem acceptable.
Think about your safety
Further, you need to ask yourself is if you feel comfortable and safe with this person. Even if you come to terms with the fact that the person deals drugs, you still run a much higher risk of being arrested, injured or killed than the average person by being in a relationship with a person who does something highly illegal in an “industry” known for violence. After all, it’s not just called the “drug war” because Nancy Reagan thought that was a catchy name. And even if you feel safe, would you be willing to let your friends or family fraternize with this person? In addition, you need to ask yourself if part of the attraction is based on the fact that you get a bit of a thrill when you think about the “bad boy” or “bad girl” image associated with drug dealing.
Figure out the rules with the drug dealer
You will also need to determine whether or not you want to set any ground rules in the relationship. For instance, perhaps you would want to come to an understanding that while you know that the person deals drugs, you don’t want that kind of activity conducted in your presence or on your property. If that’s the case, then it will be necessary for you to make it abundantly clear that you will not tolerate any sort of behavior that jeopardizes your life or your job.
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