There is always one, isn’t there! The person at a party or in a nightclub that you would rather die than spend time with: the total and utter turnoff who makes everyone cringe. Some very nice people are turnoffs because they have a lack of other people’s perception of themselves. A turnoff can be the way someone dresses to the way they speak to others or behave in public. It’s a great pity in some cases that someone does not take the person in hand and show them a few pointers. If you think you might be bordering on being labeled a ‘Turnoff’, try some of these well meaning tips for improvement:
Being aware of how much you stand out
Look around you. If you don’t see anyone else wearing sandals with black socks, ditch yours. If you spot that everyone else presses their jeans flat, don’t insist on putting a crease down the front of yours. Don’t ask why not: just do it.
Not going on the creepy side of turnoff
Don’t stalk people. If you like the look of someone and want to spend time with them, whether it’s a male or a female, they will not thank you for hanging around like an early fog for an entire evening, in spite of hints being dropped that the person would like to be alone.
Not being a pest
Don’t hassle people if they appear to be already engaged in conversation with someone else and don’t interrupt a private conversation under any circumstances – it’s rude. Wait to be asked to join a group and when you do, remember to buy a round of drinks when it is your turn, not fade away behind the curtains and hope not to be noticed.
Mimicking people who aren’t turnoffs
Take the opportunity to watch how other people behave, especially those who seem to be popular. Obviously there is no point trying to emulate the local loser (assuming that is not you). Take your hands out of your pockets when you are talking to someone and do not fiddle with your nose hairs (eek) or your ear fluff; it’s such a turnoff! If you are nervous, find something to hold such as a cocktail. Study your table manners and read a self help manual to make sure your manners are up to standard. Do not attempt to eat in public or in polite company until you absolutely sure you can get through dinner without dribbling, snorting or dropping food on your shirt.
Not being an annoyance
Do not lean over people to hear their conversation above the music, especially women: they don’t like it. Never touch someone unless they have given you a clear impression they want to be touched and never pull someone’s face toward you to whisper in their ear unless you want to risk serious injury.
If you are a smoker…
If you smoke, never smoke in someone’s home without their express permission and never attempt to smoke if you see that nobody else is doing so. Go outside to enjoy a cigarette if you must and never drop a cigarette butt in someone’s garden. Stub it, wrap it and dispose of it later.
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