Dating a co-worker can be hard because you have to balance business and pleasure at the same time. On the one hand, you want to show the other person that you’re interested, but on the other hand, you don’t want your interest to cost you your job. You have to figure out a way to remain as professional as you can while making an advance at someone, and some people don’t ever get to a good balance. All you really need is a guide to show you what to do when dating a co-worker, and you can turn that difficult situation into something positive.
Figuring out if the co-worker wants a relationship
When your at work, it’s hard to notice if people are flirting with you because the setting is so professional. Even if you work in a laid back environment, there is still an unwritten code that causes co-workers to interact in a certain way. Often times a friendly gesture can be seen as flirtation, while a flirtatious advance can go entirely unnoticed. That’s because co-workers are naturally supposed to be nice to each other, so any sort of special attention may just be seen as a means for a business transaction. To really read your co-worker, you’ll actually need to watch them outside of their interactions with you. See if they act that way with just you, or if that’s just they way they are. See if they treat customers the same way as they treat you for the true test. If you’ve just been the victim of the other person’s “friendly face,” then the co-worker probably isn’t interested in you. If, on the other hand, the other person smiles at you in a special way or perhaps talks to you in a more laid back manner, then he or she may very well be flirting. You’ll have to be the judge on that.
Where and how to ask the co-worker out
Obviously, you aren’t going to send the other person a memo saying that you think they’re cute or anything that’s too unprofessional. You have to remember that you are in a place of employment and respond according to that. The easiest way to talk to a co-worker is to catch them as they are going to their car. By that time they are off the clock and out of the office enough to talk like a normal person. Then, you will no longer be co-workers, but rather two adults who happen to be interested in one another. All you have to do is proceed a you normally would when asking someone out, and see if they’re up for it.
Where to go on a date
Some people look down on those who date their co-workers, and if you don’t want to deal with that initially, then it may be best if you go someplace private for your first date. Try taking the co-worker to a great restaurant on the outside of town, or invite them over for a home-cooked dinner. If neither of you have a problem with being in the public eye, then by all means go where ever you’d like. Just be prepared that if you happen to run into another co-worker, you may have to explain the situation.
Handling work and a relationship at once
If you hit it off really well (or if you have a bad break up), it will probably be hard to work together at first. You will see each other as boyfriend/girlfriend, but you’ll need to take a break from that and remember that there is a job to do. Talk about your work situation beforehand so you don’t just blow each other off when you‘re there. Make sure that both of you are aware of the other person’s work commitments, and respect that about the other person. You can schedule lunches together or maybe send the co-worker a flirty glance across the room, but you have to focus on work while you’re there. If you can handle both work and play, you’ll be much better off, and you could end up with a very successful relationship in the future.
1 Reply
B / 29 / Man / Likes Women / Single
This can be a disaster if not done properly! It will be a BAD result!
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