Nowadays more and more hearing people are dating deaf people. In this modern era the differences have minimized a lot. People realize that love can come in any form with any abilities. It has become perfectly ordinary to get attracted to a deaf person and to ask them out for a date, but dating a deaf person is quite different from normal dating. If you are thinking about trying it, here are some things to note:
Getting the deaf person’s attention
If you meet a deaf person and feel attracted to him/her and want to initiate a conversation, then wave your hand to him/her and if possible write a note to the person. Try to write your name and give it to them. Don’t hesitate to talk to them as almost all deaf people read lips. You may have to understand certain situations like if they hand over a pad and a pencil you need to understand that they want you to write down the message you are trying to convey to them and that the cant or are not interested to read lips. Speak to them by writing back and forth and ask them if they would come out for a coffee or have a coke with you, or come to a party with you.
Treating the person like normal
While on a date always treat a date just as you would to any hearing person. Remember that they are not naive, only that they cant hear you. Don’t act in a manner that they are different and thus making them feel self conscious. If you intend to really go forward with the relationship you can take further steps like asking them how to learn sign. Ask them about a proper place or a book to learn Sign. Remember there are different types of sign languages and make sure you both will know the same language. To ensure this, try to communicate effectively with the date at all times.
Balancing the hearing world and their world
Its always good manners not to use a cell phone in front of your deaf date unless you warn him/her about it. A deaf person cannot hear you talking into the phone and this makes him/her feel stupid. If you are planning to go for a movie along with your date then make sure that the movie has subtitles or closed captions. Ask more about your date to find out their specific needs. Every person is happy to answer questions that help to understand them more. Try not to feel bad that your date can’t hear. Take care not to over patronize them and allow them to handle their own problems.
What to do when the date ends
Finally making any date successful is by making each other happy and special. Even if your date is deaf, they may have great positive qualities, and you should try to highlight their good personal qualities so that they feel good about themselves. This will make them happy and help the overall quality if the date. If all went well, remember to convey message about the next meeting & also arrange a means of contact.
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