If you’re in a relationship with a clingy person but decide to terminate it, it might be more challenging than your normal break up. Clingy people tend to be extremely persistent – which is part of the problem in the first place. You might need to employ some specialized and unorthodox tactics to successfully put an end to a relationship with a clingy person.
The break-up with a clingy person
The first thing you’ll need to do is actually break up with the person. But because of the persistence issue, you’ll need to take additional steps to make sure it sticks. While honesty really is the best policy, it might not be sufficient when breaking up with a clinger. One problem that people often find when they’re in a relationship with a clingy person is that the partner can’t, essentially, take a hint. People who aren’t able to “read between the lines” will therefore need to be told very, very explicitly that the relationship is over. There are several ways to do this, and you don’t necessarily have to be mean about it even though you will have to be firm and unwavering.
Keep your distance
Once you’ve terminated the relationship, you will need to do your best to put as much distance as possible between yourself and the other person. If you frequent the same places, consider changing your habits or finding a new place to hang out. If you share a lot of the same friends, always politely discern whether or not your ex will be in the mix at gatherings so you can decide if you want to make alternate plans. It also might be advisable to bring someone with you to those gatherings if you do decide to go even if it’s just a decoy date, since this will show that you’ve moved on and discourage the person from making contact.
Let the clingy person know to move on
Even if you’ve ended the relationship and put distance between you and your ex, you’ll still likely find yourself in contact with that person because that person probably relied on you for so much during the relationship. If your ex continues to show up on your doorstep every time her kitten is sick, let her know that she needs to find someone else who can sympathize with her. If your previous paramour calls all the time, ostensibly just to chat, let him know that you don’t have time for or interest in this sort of conversation.
Cut off communication with the ex
If need be (And it probably will!), cut off all communication with your clingy ex. Let calls go to voicemail and delete without listening to them, tag the email address as spam so it goes straight to that folder, and use the peephole to screen your guests before opening the door. Silence very often speaks very loudly to people who don’t, as we said earlier, “read between the lines” very well. If you find yourself going this route, realize that the effects are likely going to be permanent. This means that you’re going to have to sacrifice any chance you had at having a post-dating friendship, so be sure you’re able to accept that.
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