Family is one of the most important things in life, but it is natural to start a life with someone else at a certain point. Along the way, you may have to deal with a jealous brother or a sister at the time you have started dating. You have to address these feelings that your sibling has without damaging your new relationship, which can be a difficult balance. Here are some tips to deal with jealousy and make both relationships work:
Respecting your sibling
As a sister/brother, you have to avoid comparison of your date to your siblings. There is nothing wrong in sharing the details about your date, but never compare how you enjoyed it more than spending time with your sister or brother. Comparison sends a message to your sibling that spending time with your date is better and may give rise to more feelings of jealousy towards your date. Make your brother or sister realize how special they still are in your eyes.
You also have to take part in nurturing your sibling’s self-worth. They have a separate and exceptional set of abilities and talents which are totally different from your boyfriend’s/girlfriend’s. Together with your parents, you have to help in recognizing their own skills and nurture it with them. You have to take time in finding that chance to further promote encouragement and appreciation.
Listening to your sibling
It is also important for you to listen to what your sibling has to say. Your brother/sister may have good points to consider about your date. Blood is still thicker than water, and they may just be looking out for your best interest. When you listen to them, instead of favoring your date, discuss with them the good quality traits you appreciate from him/her and how he/she makes you happy. Keep an open mind through everything though in case they have a good point.
Sharing your time with everyone
The main thing is to spend equal time with each brother/ sister and your date. You can spend time with each other by shopping, playing, watching a movie, or by reading a book while giving quality time as well to your date. This will reassure your brother/sister that he/she is appreciated and loved, and you‘ll still get to have a boyfriend or girlfriend. Everyone wins, and by doing this, you may lessen the jealousy a bit.
If all else fails…
Get your parents to help you out. Reports have shown that sibling jealousy generally occurs due to comparison and lack of attention by family members. There should always be a balanced treatment to all siblings, and your parents can help that happen. This will encourage your siblings to gain good behavior and become more understanding to situations. Your parents can talk to your sibling to maybe ease the jealousy a bit. At the very least, your they may get the siblings off your back a bit. Look to your mom and dad for guidance, and hopefully you’ll be able to have a good relationship with everyone.
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