This is a question that concerns most parents. It’s likely that back in your youthful days you remember losing your virginity when you were… in your late teens? Chances are you’ve convinced yourself those were the “good old days,” when times were simple. Today, though, it’s hard to keep track of changing sexual trends and mores, and you might even think you aren’t equipped to deal with advancements in technology. In your day parents could keep a track of you by word of mouth and a close-knit network, but today with cell phones, text messages, and Internet dating, getting laid seems easier than ever.
Additionally, your kids are constantly exposed to sensitive topics like sex from an early age. Magazines, Victoria’s secret banners, Internet ads – everything seems to highlight and glorify sex as the final goal or main focus of all human beings. It is a strong instinct, after all.
So how can you tell if your children are sexually active? In a nutshell, you need to be observant and start noticing things. Don’t get nosy, however. Looking through your children’s personal messages or emails is just invading their privacy, and that’s no way to be deal with sexual activity. Eavesdropping on your kid’s cell phone conversations isn’t a solid plan, either.
Watch for tell-tale signs of sexual activity
What’s more important is being observant of simple, routine behavior and body language, as it can tell you a lot about what’s on your child’s mind. If your kids come back home late from a party one night and act a little weird, silent, or keep a bit to themselves, they might have something on their minds. Maybe your kid has developed a recent interest toward cosmopolitan magazine articles about different sex positions; the tips to foreplays etc. and you catch them reading these tips.
Get to know your kid’s friends
You need to know who your child is hanging out with. Are they nerds in glasses scoring grades at school? Or are they party animals? Are they single? Or are they all committed and paired? Are they from strong Catholic families? Or are their parents cool with throwing beer parties in front of the kids at home? Chances are that if your kid’s friends are all committed, liberal, and non-virgins, your child might be sexually active as well. That’s because when everyone in a group is a non-virgin, there’s a substantial amount of pressure on the virgin to lose his/her virginity, especially when he/she is going out with someone. The group talks about sex and how exciting it was, narrating their stories and exchanging tips with one another for next time while there’s one individual who feels left out and wants to join in.
Talk to your child
You must understand that the best way to find out whether your kid is having sex or not, is to simply ask them. You must have that level of understanding and friendship with them to appear to them as a parent who is easy to talk to. They must not fear the wrath of your storm upon them if they are sexually active and wish confess it to you. This is extremely important; unfortunately, most parents miss this most significant point. Be available to help your child whenever he/she needs help. Be the kind, trustworthy, generous parent who can be confided in. You needn’t be extra lenient or liberal; in fact, you can be strict and have rules. But remember to be gentle where it’s necessary. If you do that, you can just talk to your child about sex from an early age and tell your kid to let you know if he/she is a sexually active or not.
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