I had the most humiliating experience the other night! I was having sex with this guy that I kind of liked for a while now. I don't see anything getting too serious with us, and I don't want it too. But, I do find him attractive so I was happy to have him in my bed. I thought that sex was really good and I thought there was good chemistry there. However, the next morning I got up to take a shower. He was still asleep in bed. I turned the water on and was in there for a minutes but I thought I should wake him up and invite him in with me. I'm about to go into the bedroom when I hear him speaking on the phone. He tells the other person on the line that I sounded like a crying hyena! I couldn't believe it! I returned to the bathroom, finished my shower, and told him to get the fuck out. I knew he was an asshole, but now I feel so insecure about how I sound during sex. I hadn't even thought about it before. I wonder if it's better if I grunt or moan. Or should I just talk dirty? How can I improve the way I sound when I'm having sex?
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Dan / Woman / Likes Men / Single
There's a cliché called "to each his own" for a reason. Just because he was talking shit doesn't mean that the next guy won't love it. You shouldn't get all bent out of shape because of something one person said. You said you hadn't thought about it before, meaning it's probably never even been an issue...so don't make it one.
Let's say a woman puts on an outfit that she thinks she looks great in, but someone she knows said she looks fat. Should she listen to the person who's "just being honest," or should she do what she wants? If you think she should listen to the person telling her she looks fat, then try to change up your style. If you think she should wear the outfit and flaunt what she's got - hopefully you feel that way - then continue to act yourself when you're in bed.
Sex is a special time where you can free yourself of whatever problems day-to-day life brings. It's a time to be yourself and let loose, not a time to be self-conscious. If you feel like moaning, moan. If you feel like screaming, scream. If you feel like "crying like a hyena," but then stop yourself because of insecurity, then the sex probably won't be as enjoyable. Besides, most guys won't find it bothersome, I assure you.
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