My boyfriend and I have been together for about six weeks now. It's been pretty good but now I'm having really bad feelings because he has a set of photographs that he just won't throw away! I found them some time ago; they're pictures of him and his ex-girlfriend having sex together. They're really explicit and as I get to know him better it hurts even more for him to have them. So, I confronted him about it and he told me they were special times that he spent with his last girl and he doesn't want to throw them away. Am I being too unfair about this? Why can't my boyfriend throw away the sex photos of his ex?
5 Replies
Dan / Woman / Likes Men / Single
You're not being unfair at all. It seems that this guy isn't over his ex, and that these pictures, as you say, represent "special times." However, if all he does is keep these pictures and possibly masturbate to them now and then, it's really not that bad.
Whether or not a man has a girlfriend, odds are he's going to fantasize about other women. I've never had a relationship or steady hookup and not fantasized about being with other girls. It's no reflection on you as a girlfriend, it's just how men are. Do you honestly think that every time he masturbates he's thinking of you?
Either way, you should be careful. As a guy I feel like I'm definitely cock-blocking your boyfriend, but I told myself before I joined this Web site that I would be honest. I'm not saying you should break up with him - you definitely shouldn't - just exercise caution. Making him throw the pictures away isn't going to take away his feelings for his ex, it's only gonna make you look like you're too anal-retentive.
Although you raise a good point, he obviously doesn't see it that way. If you can't stay silent about the matter, it's understandable, but he may not respond well.
Mary / Woman / Likes Men / Single
. seriously - keeping sexy photos of his ex girlfriend? refusing to throw them away? dump him. he doesnt love you. He shouldn'tve kept them. its WEIRD. It is! If he uses them to maturbate that is even weirder! dont listen to that answer coz if he uses it to masturbate (which he no doubt does!) then..its wrong! I mean, when guys maturbate to porn, theyre not thinking about sex with that porn star, theyre just thinking about body parts and sex in general. Its not personal. If he uses a picture of a girl he KNOWS, his EX, then its personal. he still thinks about her. Its weird . dump him. he doesnt love you. im sorry. you deserve better.
Rage · I think about sex with the porn star when i watch porn..
Dan / Woman / Likes Men / Single
Mary, where do you come up with this stuff? "When guys masturbate to porn, they're not thinking about sex with the porn star, they're just thinking about body parts and sex in general. It's not personal."
How would you know? Are you a guy? Not unless you're a dude named Mary. Which means, yet again, you're out of your element.
And if you look at the question, she's asking, "Why can't my boyfriend throw away the sex photos of his ex?" not if she should break up with him or not. All I do is answer the question they ask.
Besides, guys do tons of weird shit that girls don't know about, as I'm sure it works the same way vice versa.
In_love / Woman / Likes Men / Single
right seriously that is a joke hes with u now he shouldnt be keepin any photos of his ex never mind explicit photos... you need to confront him more nd if he doesnt give them up, he obviously hasnt give up on his ex. therefore he will never have the feelings for u that u will have for him.. he should be considerin your feelings (he is wey u now not fantasising over sum1 hu is in the past) im in a serious relationship nd if i found any photos of his ex i would knoc him out lol naw really hes wif u nd if he doesnt wan to get rid of them then u should leave him.. YOUR WORTH FAR MORE...!!!!
Add your reply to Xtinacicchelli