There’s always that question that rams people’s heads onto walls during the dating stage: who initiates the first date? And from there, all kinds of other sub-questions emerge: Do guys feel the obligation to ask the girls out or can girls finally invite guys out to dinner this time? Do men feel awkward or egoistic if a girl asks them out on a date? Do women feel embarrassed and ashamed because they are the ones who made the first move? These questions have popped into a lot of people’s minds ever since the whole dating process went through a total overhaul from a single guy asking a rather shy girl to dinner to a group of guys speed dating with a group of girls, which is why a lot of complications and issues on dating etiquette have emerged. A lot of women, on one hand, worry and stress about asking a guy to a date or simply inviting him to a possible outing during the weekend. On the other hand, some men find it difficult to walk up to a girl to ask her for a date because of the increased percentage of rejections to these types of approaches when initiating the first date. To be able to overcome this problem, here are some useful tips on how one should make the first move without having to feel embarrassed or come off as too cocky:
When a woman initiates the first date
Asking a guy first to the movies or for a cup of coffee may seem quite embarrassing and shameful at first, but really, guys nowadays actually find it impressive if a girl has the courage and guts to show interest first. Here are some tips for women in initiating the first date:The trick here is to know just how interested the guy really is, and if it’s mutual, you can then suggest an activity that you two can do together without sounding too desperate. If the guy is a stranger, you can first check and see if he’s interested in you through eye contact or smiling. If he does, wait for an opportunity to walk up to him and start a conversation with a simple “Hi, I don’t think we’ve met yet. I’m…” Make sure that you compose yourself, especially if the guy turns out to be taken, married, or he’s just not interested in the idea of dating you. This kind of attitude exudes confidence and that, alone, can attract any man from afar.But if you’re the type of girl who believes that men should do the initiating, you can indirectly give him hints on the possibility of a date through these three steps: show interest, provide him the opening or opportunity to approach you, then accept the invitation.
When a man initiates the first date
Men have always been expected to initiate the first date, which is a norm accepted in society for so many centuries. But because of insecurity and the fear of rejection, men have found it difficult nowadays to actually approach a particular girl, stranger or friend, and ask her on a date. Here are some simple tips on how to approach a girl for a date:To be able to overcome that fear and at the same time not come off as too cocky or overconfident, starting a conversation with small topics can break the ice and actually warm up things between you and your possible date. If you spot a woman who you have no connections with, you can wait for the opportunity such as her being alone or if she moves away from her group of friends so that you won’t have to worry about people listening and observing how you ask her for a date.If she rejects you, don’t take it to heart. Keep in mind that there are plenty of other women to ask out and that this is a sign that maybe the relationship won’t go anywhere after the first date. If all goes well and you feel that you and your potential date have chemistry together, you can then ask if it would be all right to invite her to dinner or an activity that you think is exciting and fun for her. The latter will work best if you’ve known each other for a while already.
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