I'm a male age 24, i was sexually abused when i was 19 by my cousin (female, then aged 21).. Now, i dont know if it was a real abuse because she suddenly started getting physically close to me and put herself on me, it got me also aroused and we had sex that night even though i knew that it was wrong and i did not want to do it, i just lost my control and was feeling disgusting about myself for doing that... I must also admit that i had an orgasm with her...
I lost interest in sex for 2 years after that and then slowly i became normal and started masturbating again, now i'm in love with a girl and i'm not able to perform in bed with her, i just lose my erection in the foreplay itself (really not sure why that happens) and i also lose interest in sex at that time however masturbation works fine for me.. I told my girlfriend that i was tired or not well to avoid embaressment.
I really really love her however i dont have any interest for real sex whatsoever, i'm just unable to perform in bed..
My Questions:
1) Does this condition has anything to do with my past experience? (i tot i had gotten out of it)
2) I really love my girl and want to be with her (without sex), how can i tell this to her? Are there chances that she will agree to be with me without sex?
3) What should i do to be able to perform in bed again?
3 Replies
Thor / 47 / Man / Likes Women / Single
Clearly this is a fake question. How could you be sexually abused when you were 19?
Were you retarded at the time?
Jenny / Woman / Likes Men / Single
Your "condition" probably does stem from your past experience. The fact that you refer to it as abuse is a sign that it was not consuensal even if you became aroused and went through with it. However, I am not a doctor but can only reccomend that you seek professional help to get passed this and be able to have sex with no issues in the future. Communication is extremely important in a relationship and you must address your inability to not have sex with your partner. Be prepared for anything even her willing to end the relationship. If sex is not a big part of a relationship to her than maybe she will agree, depends on your girl...best of luck!
Chris / Woman / Likes Men / Single
You can also have two things going on. Performance Anxiety and also to much manual stimulates. Perforamce Anxiety can happen for numerous reasons like your pass experience, stress, fatigue, medication, etc... Some times it is mental and just temporary. Sometimes more, but if you have no trouble by yourself I would think minor. You could be wanting to with your GF so much that you stop working down there.
To much manual stimulates can happen if you please yourself so much that you are only use to your self. It happens a lot with girls and vibrators. If they use a vibrator to much it is hard for a guy to measure up. Just like for a guy a girl can't do it as well and your hand is different then a girls vagina. Try to stop masturbating for a couple of days or a week and then try. Or wait longer and then you might be craving her so much that you have no problem.
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