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How do I ask for leather mask usage and seduction?
Question Asked by leatherbound about 1 year ago - [ Ask a Question ]
I've been watching a lot of sex videos lately and I've been becoming more curious about using rope, leather masks and big toys. I really want my girlfriend to have an interest in this but I don't want to scare her in thinking I'm strange or anything because we've never done anything like this before. Is there any way I can try and voice this to her without scaring her away completely?
Answer
Exploring a new fantasy, especially one that can drum up misconceptions that may make that particular fantasy seem strange or wrong, is always exciting but frightening too, especially when your partner doesn't know much about it. The fact that you haven't told your girlfriend about your awesome new interest in this particular fetish means that there's a chance that she won't seem you're strange or weird; in fact, she may even enjoy playing with you if you deliver it NOT as a burden but as a blessing to the bedroom. So, when you approach her about this, maintain a positive outlook and attitude about what turns you on. You can describe a fantasy that involves her, such as, "I get so horny thinking about you trying to wiggle out of a pair of handcuffs. You looked so good that I want to try it with you." If she seems concerned, listen to what she's concerned with and compromise. Is it a trust factor? Has she had bad experiences with bondage play before? It's okay if she's feeling anxious about this new direction, but if the two of you discuss what would make you comfortable, then it doesn't have to become an issue. You can also ask her to explore this fetish by shopping with you online for different restraints that turn the both of you on. Websites like JTStockroom and Good Vibrations have selections for both softcore and hardcore experimentation. If you start to look at toys and ropes together, she can choose restraints that make her feel sexy and safe. Talk dirty with her about how you can use the toys she likes on her, and how hot it would make you feel. Once you gradually build her interest, she may take you up on the idea.
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by ExoKisa about 1 year ago
Start out slow. Talk to her in general terms. Instead of saying, "Let's use ropes, leather masks and a paddle tonight", try, "honey, how would you feel about having your arms tied up with silk?" Silk is seductive and soft. It conjures images of feathers and tickling. It's such a light form of bondage that the word might not even occur to her when you say that. This might not be satisfying for you, but it's a step in the right direction. It also prevents you from exposing the true depths of your kinkiness to someone that might only be interested in vanilla sex.
If she's game, try it and slowly introduce more things. If she's comfortable with porn, you might want to show her some of those sex videos after a while.